Tuesday, 30 November 2010

Snow reason to panic!!!!

A few flakes of crystallised precipitation and the entire country runs around screaming "Don't panic!!!" like Jonesy in Dad's Army.

Today, after several days of really cold weather resulting in a dawn chorus of cars attempting to start with cold blighted batteries and the sound of windscreens being scraped, the snow finally arrived at Casa Khan (as Mrs Khan in a fit of madness prior to embarking on a three year holiday to "find herself" has named it).

I woke up due to the persistence of the dog attempting successfully, whilst I was in the coma I lovingly call "sleep", to take over the mandatory 75% of bedspace, to declare ownership of the occupied territory. Before marshalling my remaining neurons to attempt a counter-attack I stumbled to the bathroom to relieve the pressures built up during said coma, and en passante glanced out the window and saw it was snowing.

"Excellent", I thought, "Reason for a lie in!".

My nutty neighbours clearly had different ideas.

As you would imagine, Casa Khan sits on a hill with a magnificent view of all I survey and with good sightlines for the various implements of war for smiting the ungodly peasantry en route to change rulers.  However the road outside is effectively a "T" Junction with one (Left) branch leading past six other yurts and to a wood.  The other (right) branch leads to hundreds of yurts which are all, more or less, at the same level as Casa K.
The stem of the "T" is the hill and steep enough to make it somewhat difficult for a good driver to ascend (Or in some cases descend) and for most of my neighbours (With licences clearly either drawn in crayon or founded on Driving Tests taken for them by a single educated relative) to find impossible.

Our local council in a mad fit of responsibility that I understand they called "Use it or lose it!" have actually topped up all our grit and salt bins this year so the bend should be safe and sound for even the simplest cretins in their Chelsea tractors to get round.

However, our local council clearly did not take account of my neighbours, henceforth termed "The Feckn Numpties"

The Feckn Numpties from the left branch seemed to have some form of hive mind as they all appeared around 7am this morning, with 1" of snow already lain and in the middle of a blizzard that is continual and has been for four hours plus and started clearing their branch of the road, not down to the bend, or the bend, or the crown of the hill, but just their branch.

They were determined and came equipped. Shovels, buckets, Arctic gear, ski helmets and goggles, you name it, the feckn numpties had it, and they attacked the powdered snow that had fallen in the early hours with gusto.

Within two hours the feckn numpties had emptied the grit bins for the entire estate and had cleared the whole road section in front of their six yurts plus the pavements and their drives, it was pristine and wet and you would never believe any snow hand fallen there at all.

However God had not been apprised of their agenda and so the snow continued to fall in ever larger flakes and as I write continues in similar vein.

Thus we have a relatively treacherous hill and main part of the Estate under around 3" and rising of both powdery and heavy snow, a continuous blizzard outside, all the cars snowed in no feckn Grit or Salt left in any bins within two miles and one short section of road with six houses in a cul-de-sac which was once cleared but is now under one inch of snow and rising!

Feckn Numpties!

Ghenghis 2010

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