Tuesday, 30 November 2010
Today, after several days of really cold weather resulting in a dawn chorus of cars attempting to start with cold blighted batteries and the sound of windscreens being scraped, the snow finally arrived at Casa Khan (as Mrs Khan in a fit of madness prior to embarking on a three year holiday to "find herself" has named it).
"Excellent", I thought, "Reason for a lie in!".
My nutty neighbours clearly had different ideas.
As you would imagine, Casa Khan sits on a hill with a magnificent view of all I survey and with good sightlines for the various implements of war for smiting the ungodly peasantry en route to change rulers. However the road outside is effectively a "T" Junction with one (Left) branch leading past six other yurts and to a wood. The other (right) branch leads to hundreds of yurts which are all, more or less, at the same level as Casa K.
The stem of the "T" is the hill and steep enough to make it somewhat difficult for a good driver to ascend (Or in some cases descend) and for most of my neighbours (With licences clearly either drawn in crayon or founded on Driving Tests taken for them by a single educated relative) to find impossible.
However, our local council clearly did not take account of my neighbours, henceforth termed "The Feckn Numpties"
The Feckn Numpties from the left branch seemed to have some form of hive mind as they all appeared around 7am this morning, with 1" of snow already lain and in the middle of a blizzard that is continual and has been for four hours plus and started clearing their branch of the road, not down to the bend, or the bend, or the crown of the hill, but just their branch.
Within two hours the feckn numpties had emptied the grit bins for the entire estate and had cleared the whole road section in front of their six yurts plus the pavements and their drives, it was pristine and wet and you would never believe any snow hand fallen there at all.
However God had not been apprised of their agenda and so the snow continued to fall in ever larger flakes and as I write continues in similar vein.
Friday, 26 November 2010
The BBC have reported the following:
Zimbabwe's Prime Minister Morgan Tsvangirai has begun legal action against President Robert Mugabe over the appointment of regional governors.
Mr Tsvangirai says he should have been consulted over the appointments under the power-sharing deal which saw him become prime minister.
Mr Mugabe's allies have dismissed the claims.
The case is the latest sign of worsening relations between the long-time rivals.
South Africa's President Jacob Zuma, the mediator of the power-sharing deal, is due in Harare later to try to iron out the pair's differences.
"In my humble view, submission and plea, all of this is plain, clear and simple. Wherever the Constitution obliges the President to act in consultation with me as Prime Minister, he must first secure my agreement," Mr Tsvangirai said in court papers, reports the AFP news agency.
The BBC's Brian Hungwe in Harare says both leaders have been increasingly critical and outspoken about the failures of the power-sharing agreement - with both calling for an early election.
Last month Mr Mugabe said that the coalition deal should not be renewed when it expires in February.
They agreed to form a unity government after the country's economy collapsed following disputed elections in 2008.
A key part of the deal was to draft a new constitution.
But the process of agreeing a new constitution has been halted following repeated reports of political violence.
On Thursday, Finance Minister Tendai Biti told journalists that Zimbabwe had the finances to cover a poll next year.
"We have put money for elections, of course and for referendums," Mr Biti told journalists after presenting his 2011 budget.
However the winds of change were blowing and the USSR was doing what it always did best (In fact what it's current incarnation is still doing well) and that is training and equipping plus encouraging armed insurrection, terrorists and guerilla groups.
One such African group was led by Robert Mugabe who, while at Patrice Lumumba University in Russia, became firm friends with other "freedom fighters" in the ANC and forged links which have to date ensured non interference of any adequate kind from South Africa, who are the best nation to work with the people of Zimbabwe to restore democracy and freedom there.
Unfortunately the white farmers, for all their efficiencies, allowed themselves to believe for too long that they were impervious to change and were unprepared for Mugabe and his "freedom fighters" who, having won the country by force or arms then went on to completely bankrupt it by being similarly arrogant and inflexible.
But, why should we give a shit? What has it to do with us?
Well, the people of Zimbabwe are starving (Serves them right for keeping supporting Mugabe eh?) and are leaving and going to South Africa.
This is destabilising South Africa
We need a stable South Africa
We also need NOT to keep on pumping money into starving Africa.
IF Zimbabwe comes under decent sensible and prudent leadership it would not take long, 5 to 10 years, before it could once again be pumping out it's excess food into the rest of starving Africa.
Zimbabwe would not need foreign aid to sustain itself but instead would have a healthy bank balance and prosperous citizens. It could also revive it's defunct Tourist Industry for more foreign currency.
The pressures on South Africa would be lessened and with a boost for its own people and economy.
Starvation in the rest of Southern Africa would be less of a threat.
We would have to pay out less in foreign aid to Southern Africa.
South Africa's President jacob Zuma needs to get off his arse and help rather than posturing from the sidelines and playing to his ANC Gallery and the rest of us need to make some noise.
Wednesday, 24 November 2010
Something I do NOT understand at all and that is WHY?
|Not like Johnny Depp|
Pirates are not some loveable characters as currently portrayed by Johnny Depp who bumble about sounding like Keith Richard and being attracted to and attracting Kiera Knightly.
They are savage nasty evil murdering scum who go out on the ocean hundreds of miles offshore and terrorise oceans in order to steal boats and sell them having killed the owners or to steal boats and ransom them and their occupants back to those who are willing to pay on pain of killing the owners or their employees.
Therefore, and bearing in mind that this happens normally outside the territorial waters of a sovereign nation, why has whichever Navy captures these pirates NOT dispensed summary justice as was done in the olden days?
Walking the plank or hanging people from the yard-arm is probably unacceptable however a Hellfire Missile up the exhaust pipes of their Dhow might make the point in an indelible and Darwinianly acceptable manner, that Piracy should be extinct in the 21st Century.
UPDATE 22nd February 2011 From the BBC
Monday, 22 November 2010
Do these fuckwits give a damn about the danger they are putting the rest of us into?
It could be argued "Why should they care?" after all, for years drivers had non-hands free cellphones and the law to be obeyed on NOT "driving without due care and attention" and the Police studiously ignored that law and could not be arsed to follow up complaints about said behaviour, let alone do it first hand and enforce the law of the land.
No, instead the Police, who seem to forget that "Policing by consent" does NOT mean that they have to agree to get off their arses and do the job they are being paid for but instead refers to us, Joe Public, consenting to be policed by a small and unarmed Police Force, lobbied the politicians who just love creating new laws into making a law specifically making the use of a mobile phone illegal whilst moving if you hold it to your ear.
Once they had that law, the second law to cover the same offence, they promptly apparently decided to ignore that law too, despite it being one of the easiest laws ever to enforce.
IF you spot someone on a mobile phone whilst driving and they have it to their ear, just NOTE THE TIME. Stop them asap, arrest them under caution, take down their details including the cellphone number of the phone they were using (Make a test call to get that number yourself) and then let them go. Then obtain the records from the cellular provider which will "prove" the start duration and end times of the call they were making when you observed them.
OK, well have another doughnut and think about it.
Sunday, 21 November 2010
Patchouli (Pogostemon cablin (Blanco) Benth; also patchouly or pachouli) is a species from the genus Pogostemon and a bushy herb of the mint family, with erect stems, reaching two or three feet (about 0.75 metre) in height and bearing small pale pink-white flowers. The plant is native to tropical regions of Asia and is now extensively cultivated in China, India, Thailand, Indonesia, Malaysia, Mauritius, Philippines, West Africa and Vietnam.
The scent of patchouli is heavy and strong, used for centuries in perfumes. The word derives from the Tamil patchai (Tamil: பச்சை) (green), ellai (Tamil:இலை) (leaf) . In Assamese it is known as xukloti.
Pogostemon cablin, P. commosum, P. hortensis, P. heyneasus and P. plectranthoides are all cultivated for their oils and all are known as 'patchouli' oil, butP. cablin is considered superior.
Now this could be because of my ill spent youth when a certain Sgt Darnell of the local plod used to wander around all the youth pubs in the City and try and "score". (You never did work out that during the 60's, anyone with a short back and sides trying to score drugs in a youth Pub might just as well have had the letters F.U.Z.Z. tattooed on his forehead, did you Sgt D??) and so any of us who had been sitting too close to the local stoners when they were passing the duchies on the left hand side needed to cover up that lingering aroma. Hence the blessings of Patchouli.
Looking for something that was low enough to allow me to perve her I spotted some Patchouli Soap and so bought a few bars to have a nostalge but also for the view. The view was extremely inviting and I imagined myself going flubflubdub all afternoon, but I digress. I mentioned my liking for the smell and she agreed and then pointed out a bath-bomb infused with the same oils and, overwhelmed by yet another lengthy viewing of her wondrous orbs, I succumbed and bought that too.
This morning I ran a nice hot bath and dropped said bath-bomb in and then as it was fizzling away I got in and went to sit down!
Fortunately my dive was stopped by my head and cheek connecting first with the tiled wall and then with the taps and my hip, leg and bum caroomed off the side of the bath like the pinball in Tommy before the rest of the body that was untouched at that point hit the water at about Mach 2.
The resultant tidal wave meant the bathroom floor now does not need it's annual clean next week and emptying the bath got easier.
As I felt around my bicycle tyres where my lips used to be I was grateful to discover that most of my teeth were still in place and the bleeding was not making the rest of the water unacceptable to finish my ablutions within.
Post bath I discovered a black eye, left hand side of face extremely swollen and bruises in places I was amazed the bath found! I also have a large cut above the eye.
There aint no justice!
Friday, 19 November 2010
Apparently, a last-ditch plot to oust Gordon Brown from Downing Street was hatched over roast goose at the country home of Harriet Harman, Labour’s deputy leader,.
- Being the NCCL Legal Officer and signing documents attempting to water down the child pornography laws and proposed legislation at a time when the Paedophile Information Exchange and the Paedophile Action for Liberation were invited affiliates to NCCL (Incidentally when they were invited, Patricia Hewitt was Chair and a certain Jack Dromey, Harman's husband, was a member of its Executive Council).
- Her total arrogance and disregard of "the common people" evidenced by her refusal to stop and report a traffic accident whilst alledgedly talking on a mobile phone and having a collision with a parked car. "I am Harriet Harman, you know where to find me!" she carolled as she drove off.
- Her ridiculously misleading usage of statistic on trafficking and
supportchampioning of legislation that makes prostitution (A totally legal activity by the way) a far more dangerous occupation for women than it needs to be.
- Stabbing her Leader, Gordon Brown, in the back whilst praising him to his face.
The Labour Leadership is now agonising about whether it is better to have Harriet inside the tent pissing out, or outside the tent, pissing in; On her track record the answer is NEITHER, just Piss Off!!
Madame, you are the weakest link, Goodbye!!
Thursday, 18 November 2010
If it was up to me I would say "Thanks Camelot, you have taken what was a very high producing Cow and are now producing just a dribble of what it could do." and take it away from them.
Why have people stopped playing the Lottery?
"You are more likely to be struck by lightning than to win the lottery!"
Now that one is clearly absolute bollocks as if every week someone in the UK or in fact several people in the UK, were struck by lightning then all our houses and buildings would have massive lightning conductors as they have in Johannesburg, and people would never go out in a storm, let alone play golf or go near trees.
Also, it would be headline news and questions would be raised in the House.
So why do people play less?
Well, in my opinion it is because Camelot got overtaken by greed and lost the plot.
So, if I was in charge, I would take it, scrap all other games except the UK Lottery every SATURDAY at 7pm with a rollover every time the jackpot was not won and only that one game.
The greater revenue accumulated in total would mean far more money for worthy causes and so everyone's a winner.
So Richard Branson, if you are reading this, next time around bid for it using this paradigm change and you have my vote mate!
Wednesday, 17 November 2010
Sunday, 14 November 2010
They were only prevented from getting a severe beating from people who found this offensive in the extreme by our British Police who they publicly vilify. This group claims "We do not respect the Poppy, we do not respect the British war dead and we do not respect the police" and yet they were more than happy to be protected from a counter protest from the far right.
Cast you mind back to the cynical and outrageous reactions to the cartoon in Denmark of Mohammed and the disgraceful treatment of a Primary school teacher who allowed her class to name a bear "Muhammad" after one girl's best friend.
A Mosque in Portsmouth has been attacked in apparent reprisal by some mindless English thugs who, if caught will and should be punished to the full extent allowed by law. Escalating these atrocious acts is not acceptable.
BUT it is well past time that the British Imams and Leaders of the British Muslim Community started showing some backbone and condemning those rogue elements of their community that stir up dissent, magnify differences and refuse to allow the Muslims in the UK to integrate properly into UK society.
The UK is well used to immigration and integration and over the centuries we have gained a well earned reputation for being a tolerant and welcoming country and have gained immeasurably from the immigrants that have made this their home and have been absorbed into our culture, thus changing our culture for the better; However, ghettoisation and enclaves has never worked and where that happens, problems occur.
This is being written shortly before 11am on Remembrance Sunday and I sincerely hope that no more similar protests occur and that both communities can get back to getting to know each other as part of the greater whole that is the United Kingdom.
Saturday, 13 November 2010
I joined their site so that these cretins could take their best shot at me and see what they got back in return when I was not hampered by being a Moderator and thus able to say what I really thought.
They could not face me and so banned me!! ROTFLMAO
The owner then posted that anyone saying anything he considered derogatory about him or his site anywhere on the web would be banned.
You could not make that sort of shit up!
However, as I know from their posts what sort of woman would suit them down to the ground, I have trawled the web and now offer them a place that will fulfil their wildest fantasies (Well, except the schoolgirl ones).
Women without an opinion
Friday, 12 November 2010
Whenever a seasoned punter tells them that they actually spent time with an escort (Insert your word of choice here) other than rogering her senseless and with no attempt whatsoever to make the experience mutually enjoyable, they heehaw like a beach donkey on a hot day and trot out the old tired line about "I don't pay good money to watch a whore drink tea!" or similar about watching her eat a meal.
Well, Newsflash guys; A lot of us DO have a drink with an escort or a meal and we do not pay her anything for it either. That's because some of us have personalities and also because we have a good attitude.
When I meet an escort socially I make one thing VERY clear from the start and that is that I am not going to take the piss and if we end up in bed then I will pay her her going rate for the "intimate time". I do not, and have never, paid an escort to go to lunch, dinner etc or to just talk to me although I would hire them to go to a social event if I needed a companion as some of my friends who are escorts are people that I would love to have on my arm at places like Henley or Ascot. I find that as long as you have clearly defined boundaries then everyone can relax and enjoy themselves.
I do not go out of my way to select Escorts who will go for a drink afterwards but I often find that if you get along well and are "sympatico" then you often click enough to do that.
Just yesterday I was having a very nice (Paid) session with a lady and then in exchange for her making me lunch took some photos of her for her website and showed her how to upload them etc. After that she asked me to stick around for a couple of hours so I did a few jobs on her site for her and then she took me out for dinner and then as I was leaving gave me a big bag of fruit and some home made food she had cooked me. Now this was a "one-off" but it is not totally atypical, however when you try and tell the knuckle draggers that they just do not understand it and so refuse to believe it.
My own philosophy on working girls is that I am extremely happy to exchange wrinkled pictures of the Queen in exchange for time making smiles with attractive and sexy ladies who I would have only been able to gaze at from afar as a civilian. To me, Punting is the best Hobby ever and I just wish I had discovered it earlier in life.
A thank you to all the ladies I have met in the past and to all those I have yet to meet.
Thursday, 11 November 2010
With proud thanksgiving, a mother for her children,
England mourns for her dead across the sea.
Flesh of her flesh they were, spirit of her spirit,
Fallen in the cause of the free.
Solemn the drums thrill; Death august and royal
Sings sorrow up into immortal spheres.
There is music in the midst of desolation
And a glory that shines upon our tears.
They went with songs to the battle, they were young,
Straight of limb, true of eye, steady and aglow.
They were staunch to the end against odds uncounted;
They fell with their faces to the foe.
They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old,
Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun and in the morning
We will remember them.
They mingle not with laughing comrades again;
They sit no more at familiar tables of home;
They have no lot in our labour of the day-time;
They sleep beyond England's foam.
But where our desires are and our hopes profound,
Felt as a well-spring that is hidden from sight,
To the innermost heart of their own land they are known
As the stars are known to the Night;
As the stars that shall be bright when we are dust,
Moving in marches upon the heavenly plain;
As the stars that are starry in the time of our darkness,
To the end, to the end, they remain.
Wednesday, 10 November 2010
But what is all the fuss about?
Well, basically, some years ago when only the brightest 10% of the population went to University and others attended college or took apprenticeships, that is, in the days when we had a manufacturing industrial base to the UK, some bright spark decided that selling off our Nationalised Industries was "a good thing", they also signed up to totally "free trade" which basically ment that any Tom Dick or Abe could trade INTO the UK but kept the trade barriers and tariffs in place that prevented us trading abroad.
With our decline in manufacturing and "rationalisation" of all the other industries and "downsizing" came the advent of mass unemployment.
And thus it came to pass, and everyone's son and daughter, no matter how thick, knew that their "right" was 4 years dossing in a poly in drag at the very least followed by a guaranteed job because they had a degree.
So now we have young people, with bright shiny degrees who have been unemployed since they left "University" who have rejection letters in the 2-300s and who are unemployable and who have college debts that they will never have to pay off because they will never earn enough to reach the threshold for the payback to start.
Student protests are not in any way a new thing, however in the past it was for something real like Banning the Bomb or trying to stop Wars, stuff that although quixotic and daft was also typical of agonized youth.
Today's cynical riots were orchestrated by left wingers and vested interests and were designed to attempt to stop a completely sensible and sane policy of ensuring that only those people who can expect to make good use of their degrees will be tempted to apply for a University and those who just want a four year doss of cheap booze and even cheaper sex will be encouraged to think again.
No-one has a "right" to a University education, it is a privilege and should be treated as such and if earned, cherished and used to the full, not wasted by having a coach trip to London and giving the police a good kicking!
Or, stop being such a lazy bar steward!
The number of people who ask dumb questions on Twitter or Bulletin Boards who seem incapapble of doing a simple Google search or whatever search engine they have amazes me.
Surely if they have access to a PC and t'Internet then they also have access to a search engine?
If so why not use it BEFORE asking the dumb questions?
In the same way that trade names, such as Aspirin and Hoover have been absorbed into the English Language as generic descriptions, so for example, a lot of people refer to "doing the hoovering" or "hoovering it up" whilst using a Dyson or an Electrolux, searching the net and "Googling" are now synonymous terms it seems.
Also, it takes less time to type your query into Google than to post a tweet or to post something on a bulletin board so all people are doing is underlining their lack of knowledge and also their inability to use the tools.
Whist on the subject of "The English Language", can we please have more software and hardware manufacturers using the term "English" as a stand-alone and only referring to "American English" when using that particular bastardisation? It would also be in everyone's best interests if alphabetical lists of countries when registering equipment and software did not start off
Believe it or not, the USA is NOT the centre of the universe, and it just betrays the abject ignorance of Americans to suggest different.
Anyone wanting to know where the centre of the Universe actuall is should google it.
For those too lazy, this is the result:
Friday, 5 November 2010