A young lady who blogs and is referenced here (Sabrina, you know who you are!!) often writes porn of a very high calibre, whilst not being of her standard, I offer this meagre tale as a response and maybe something to turn her on a little to repay the many arousals she has given me.
As the door shut and your last Bridesmaid ran down to where their car was waiting for them you breathed a sigh of relief and inspected your make-up – all looking good, you turn to the door of your hotel room to go to where your father is waiting in the Limo.
As you open the door, I am there. You look surprised to see me and smile uncertainly.
“Just a kiss ‘Goodbye and Good Luck” I say and duck in for a kiss.
You lift your head to me and we kiss, gently at first and then with more and more force until our tongues are fighting wildly and my hands are holding your arse.
Feeling you melting in my arms I walk you back into the room, backwards until your legs hit the bed and you lie back, legs akimbo with your dress rising up to show pure white stockings with one blue garter.
I fall to the bed with you, kissing you madly and start to feel your breasts from the outside of your dress at first, then, as your nipples harden, I reach into your dress and scoop out first one, then both of your plump breasts. Moving down towards them with my tongue I suckle and kiss them with great desire.
Your hands move to my penis and massage it slowly through my trousers.
I move further down and off the bed and lift your dress to reveal stockings and suspenders plus a white filmy pair of the smallest panties known to man.
I gently move them aside and lick you gently and slowly all over your clit, over your labia and down the velvet strip to your bum.
I then move back and push my tongue right inside your pussy and then lave your clit and lips with multiple forms and designs until you cum magnificently, squirting and crying noisily.
“Give me your fucking prick now!!” you cry and I stand up, take off my trousers and pants, push your panties to your ankles and slide inside your moist pussy and start to slowly make love to you.
You reach round and grab my bum and pull me in further.
You speed up your bucking and I can hold back no longer.
All too soon I come with a sob, and we lie there for a few short moments.
“The time!!” you cry and rush to your feet, slipping your boobs back inside the dress, checking your makeup in the mirror you run down to your car, leaving me in an empty room with nothing but your perfume and a very small pair of damp white panties………..
You make the Church with minutes to spare and your bridesmaids compliment you on the colour in your cheeks and the sparkle in your eye.
As you slowly walk down the aisle, all clad in white, some of my sperm trickles gently out of your pussy and down your leg where it lodges in the tops of your stockings………
You clear your mind and take your Father's arm as you walk towards the priest and your future husband.
One Hundred and Fifty Years of Feminist movements, from the early suffragettes through to the modern feminazis and through the same period us having wider and deeper education of the common masses and the result is:
She's nothing like a girl you've ever seen before! Nothing you can compare to your neighbourhood whore! I'm tryinna find the words to describe this girl without being disrespectful!!!
The way that booty movin' - I can't take no more Have to stop what I am doin' so I can pull her up close I'm tryinna find the words to describe this girl without being disrespectful!!!
Damn Girl!!!!!!!
Damn you's a sexy bitch, sexy bitch Damn you's a sexy bitch Damn Girl!!!
Damn you's a sexy bitch, sexy bitch Damn you's a sexy bitch!!!!
"And I know I wanna say goodbye But girl you make it hard to be faithful With the lips of an angel"
STOP!! Before you read any further, yes this IS about pussy lips and is NOT about facial lips. OK, now we have that damn straight, and you are clearly still here, read on...............................
Pussies are like fingerprints. No, I don't think that the Metropolitan Police (Or Old Bill as we still know and love them as) will ever decide that taking pussy prints will be as effective at catching villains as fingerprints (Although if anyone wants to fund me into taking pussy prints for a National Database they will find my rates VERY reasonable) but I have to make the point that every pussy is different.
Now virtually every bloke knows this but, and I personally found this to be amazing, is that most women, especially those in the sex industry, do not seem to know that there are one heck of a lot of different pussies out there.
Now ask a bloke if his best mate has a big or small dick and is circumcised or not and I will bet you any money that he knows and has also secretly envied him for years if it is bigger or gently thought of him as inferior if it is smaller!
Why is this?
Is it because all blokes are closet homosexuals really? Nope. Is it because most women are confident in their own attractions and do not want or need to check out the opposition? Double Nope.
I think the answer probably lies in the way each sex pees and a phenomenal invention called The Urinal. Blokes, because they piss standing up have plenty of opportunity when growing up to see another guy peeing, either au-naturel in the countryside or in a Public/Pub toilet. Any blokes reading this? Try telling me that you have never checked out the opposition's equipment when you can and hoped to God you didn't get caught peeking.
Whereas the Ladies would find it much more difficult in the time between a hairless pre-pubescent pussy and a shaved pussy to actually do similar. So Ladies, the first two charts are for your use so you can get a good look at what the opposition have to offer and with some dexterous use of a hand held mirror (Careful as despite appearances the secretions of a pussy are lousy to clean glass with) you can check up on your undercarriage and compare.
Of course removal of the pubic hair, in whole or part, adds to the visibility and attraction (In my humble opinion although others may disagree) of a pussy and once it is removed then adornments and decorations, even paint or tattoos, become accessible to the more adventurous of the ladies.
Although in a previous Blog I have likened the appearance of a nude and spread pussy to an opened Mussel (And been taken to task by some for my presumption) and despite some ladies of my acquaintance referring to it as their "Clam", I have always thought it reminded me more of an Oyster. No, not that strange blue card they use in London but the shellfish once opened. Not because of the taste, although some ladies on warm days seem to develop an "Eau du Poisson" flavouring, a nicely washed and presented pussy tastes like heaven.
Men also take every opportunity when looking at porn, once they have stopped being green with envy at the size of the todger of the actors, to actually check out the shape of the blokes and see if they are roundheads or cavaliers. They also check out the pussies on show for a host of reasons but one is to decide which type they find visually most appealing.
So ladies, next time you are in a position to be able to check out another lady's vaj, not only take a quick butchers, but tell her that you would appreciate a close-up inspection of her lady parts and offer to return the compliment.
You will be given a new perspective on life and who knows, you may even find it becomes a new Hobby!
Broken Britain
A lot has been written and talked about concerning what people call "Broken Britain" but in the main people seem to think that someone else snuck in while we weren't looking and knocked it over when in reality we are all to blame either by creating it or even worse by not standing up and being counted when it was being broken.
So what do we do about it? Who broke it? How do we fix it? Here are some embryonic ideas that might help:
Who Broke Britain?
Well, the short answer is; "We all did", either by direct actions or complacency, apathy or being too concerned with our own lives. We got taken up with Maggie's "Me first" ideologies and missed the fact that at the same time that she was breaking the unions and bringing in the Gordon Gekko "greed is good" philosophies that have tainted us, the insidious left were undermining our basic institutions.
So, in short, in my opinion, extreme left wing and right wing ideologies since the last War actually created Broken Britain and now we need to fix it.
Apart from the Banking system which I have pilloried in earlier blogs and where I have suggested a mild solution of hanging one in ten Bankers from lamp posts in the city "pour encourager les autres" I feel the following areas need to be examined and to adopt solutions as shown. Clearly this is not meant to be a scholarly document but a vox pop piece reflecting how the man on the Clapham Omnibus feels and how we can put it right. Instead of posturing and posing in Parliament, maybe these wastes of space which were the MPs who came back from holiday and ensured their local paper had a good soundbite last Thursday could actually get together and pass the relevant legislation?? After all, is that not what we elected them to do?
Parents
Lets start with the Parents as they are supposed to be the biggest influence on a child.
The majority of children appearing before the Riot Courts in the past few days have not had their parents with them. Parents of these children have failed completely in bringing them up and are now trying to ignore the behaviour and it's consequences of their offspring. This is going to become a little harder to do because when "Wayne" gets sent down for looting then Mum and Dad can find themselves evicted, and good thing too.
These parents do not seem to give a damn OR are terrorised by their kids. But why?
Well, let's face it, in the old days, if a kid came home and told his parents he was in trouble at school or with the police, the first thing would be his parents punishing him or her in advance of any other action.
This was more prevalent in immigrant families who certainly agreed with "spare the rod and spoil the child" as a philosophy but it also pertained in basic British families.
Then the left wing brought in laws which said "Thou shalt not smack your child" - when there was absolutely zero evidence in favour of no smacking and mountains of evidence that it worked. Lets be real here, we are not talking about a "Baby P" scenario where a child can be battered to death by inhuman brutes while the zillions of support services play "The Three Wise Monkies" but on simple discipline of a child to make them realise that there are boundaries and limits to what society will accept. One has to wonder if Jamie Bulger's parents would have wished his killer's parents to have brought their two killer sons up with more discipline?
Discipline in itself is not the answer as a child has to be lovingly disciplined if it is to work but taking away discipline from a loving parent makes their job 20x harder, we need to reverse this.
Teachers
At the same time as the Left were attacking Parents, they also attacked Teachers. This was made easier by the teaching unions who were at the time very left wing and progressive and who called for corporal punishment in schools to be banned. Teachers who caned or slippered were portrayed as sadists or sexual deviants or both. Fifty years ago, if a child was in trouble at school, parents were embarrassed and would support the teacher and indeed give further punishments to the child. Now parents regularly confront teachers and in a lot of cases actually attack them physically when their children are in trouble.
Teachers do have a disciplinary role but if they have no means of enforcement and no support from feral parents then it is unsurprising that they abnegate that role.
We need to empower teachers to employ corporal punishment as an ultimate deterrent, under strict rules, and to ensure parents who attack teachers are immediately gaoled until their case is heard.
Police
Watching brief
Then we have the Police. I cannot remember how many successive Governments have talked about getting more police on the streets but who have enacted policies that did the exact opposite. A lot of the rioters have said that the only reason they chanced their arm in looting was that there were too few police to stop them and those who were there originally were not getting stuck in.
On the Saturday, Sunday and Monday of the riots, this was predominantly the case as too few Police Officers were on the streets and thos who were were powerless to stop the hundreds of looters. However their reluctance to become involved was also pretty redolent of two main themes; Reaction to the G20 riots prosecution of a Police Officer and a general expectation by senior Police Officers that some crimes are not worth pursuing. The former is a case where on mature reflection, I think it was wrong to prosecute the officer. Yes he was heavy handed, yes what he did was wrong, BUT we do not want our riot police to be thinking about the cameras watching them whilst they are attempting to quell a riot, we want them to quell it. A case in point is people moaning about Police Brutality where Manchester Police were shown giving Rioters on bikes and wearing hoodies a short sharp shock with batons. The You Tube video went viral with the vast majority of people watching it praising the Police for what they did. If they do trace the officers (Which I hope they don't), it should be to give them a People's Medal.
On the second point, it came to light last week that some Police Forces are refusing to send an officer out to 50% of crimes and will only investigate crimes where CCTV or direct witness evidence exists and a known suspect. Now who on earth set up a league table of crimes and decided that investigation was determined on needing it to be on camera?? Does this mean if someone is murdered in the middle of a forest, no policeman hears the 999 call?
It also explains why soft targets like motorists speeding or having slightly misaligned number plates get prosecuted whilst burglary prosecutions decline rapidly.
The Police also seem to be able to choose what laws they will enforce and what they will not. As an example, when was the last time you saw any copper at all bothered by someone driving an HGV whilst on the phone with it to their ear?? Despite the fact that it is highly dangerous behaviour and redolent of a "couldn't give a fuck!" attitude?
Solutions
So, what are the solutions to this sort of behaviour and how do we re-enable parents, teachers and Police to be able to reshape society to they way the majority want it? Here are a few suggestions:
Transportation
In the old days or maybe the "good" old days, when we ruled most of the world it was relatively easy, just transport the felons you did not need to Australia and let them survive or not as colonists in the New World.
However we have none of these options available and Australia has caught on and has sent people like Peter Tatchell over here to plague us rather than keeping him at home.
Repeal some laws
We need to get parliament to repeal some laws and also some white papers on corporal punishment in schools, smacking etc. In short all the laws that make parenting more difficult and teaching more onerous.
A good sort out of laws that are manifestly NOT being enforced by the Police would be good too with the ones remaining being rigorously enforced by the Police.
All Crimes to be Investigated
If a crime is really a crime then it needs to be investigated. Dropping litter on the streets is an offence and needs to be on the spot fined but Burglary is a Crime and should always be investigated properly. It is NOT a waste of time to investigate as most burglars get better as they go on so are more likely to get caught on earlier crimes.
Enact New Laws
Some laws need to be enacted; Making Parents equally responsible for their children's actions might be draconian but losing your council house should be the minimum if you child riots and loots. Proceeds of crime legislation needs to be extended to households where their income vastly exceeds their benefits and an onus of proof on source of funds needs to be upon the holder not on the Police.
Old days hoodies, still evil
Gun crime needs stiffer penalties and carrying knives or any other offensive weapon under cover needs to be an immediate gaol sentence.
Wearing Hoodies or balaclavas in public when the weather is not snowing or wintery needs to be an offence and so does wearing hoodies when 5 or more are gathered together. Citizens need to have a fear free environment.
Threatening behaviour needs to be a more stiff penalty offence as well.
Enforce Existing Laws
Clearly enforcing existing laws would be sensible and although Parliament including "Call me Dave" mentioned "The Riot Act" when talking about victim compensation, there is an overwhelming need to actually use The Riot Act in the midst of or at the start of an actual riot. Therefore the 1973 repeal of the Riot Act needs to be overturned and provisions made to enforce it.
The original Riot Act gave a "riotous assembly" a short period of time to disperse peaceably before the authorities could use all force to disperse the rioters. Powers were also given to indemnify any citizens helping the Police or Authorities against prosecution in the case that that enforcement resulted in the death of a rioter.
National Service
There should be two types of National Service introduced, Military and Civilian. These should both be for a period of two years and volunteers should have the choice of either branch.
Civilian should be broken down in to uniformed volunteers and for offenders. The Offenders should be made to wear dayglo orange jump suits with "OFFENDER" written in black on them prominently. Army style discipline should be the norm for both Military and Civilian branches but with citizenship and personal behaviours training also given.
OK, this is not the perfect solution by any means but it is something that I have been mulling over for a while and have decided to put out there for consideration and comment. Yes it has a lot of flaws but it is the idea that is behind it that counts and I welcome anyone's constructive comments on it.
A friend of mine on Twitter who is one of the more articulate and travelled punters asked me to do a Blog entry about "Sex in an Islamic State" and upon reflection this seemed like something fun to write about as there are still a lot of people who think that everywhere of that nature is ruled by Mad Mullahs and Sharia Police and that just thinking of sex as a westerner can get you beheaded. So here goes.
Dubai
Dubai still under construction
Dubai is one of my real bête noire of the places to go because it is so hypocritical. They give you an image of hedonism and unparalleled freedoms where the reality is from the moment you arrive you are treated with contempt by officialdom, the majority of the buildings are unfinished shells which are lit at night to give the illusion of untrammelled growth and everything overpriced.
Hotels are very expensive but virtually all of them do have working girls operating in them and in their night clubs attached. Competition is high for these ladies and so it is best to decide early on which one you want and then secure her services. This in Dubai however is a very expensive option as they tend to want feeding and watering as well which really racks up the overall cost.
I have done it there for the experience but ONLY for the experience and will not repeat that or indeed return if I have any say in the matter.
Ghenghis Punting Index for Dubai puts it at -5 (Out of 1-10)
Algeria
Now this is an interesting one as the one thing you do have to realise is that although Algeria does not have any real tourist industry it does have an extremely effective and large secret police force and so if you are planning on punting just be aware that this will be noted in the archives.
Having said that most hotels there have a reasonable selection of ladies to choose from however the ability to speak French is preferable if you are going to negotiate as they all start high.
A typical punting evening starts over dinner where you are warmed up by the "local" belly dancers. Strangely enough in Algeria, virtually all of these belly dancers are Russian and speak good English. A few minutes hovering near the lift (As they all tend to live on the premises) tends to elicit that they also supply additional services and this tends to result in a more reasonably priced encounter but without the local frisson.
Alternatively the local girls hunt in pairs and are to be found in all of the hotel bars. These will be dressed in Western fashion and will be chatting away, apparently animatedly to each other, however looking directly at them tends to elicit a smile and a wave. There appears to be a common rule that they are not allowed to approach you directly so a gesture for them to join you will be ignored but if you walk across and introduce yourself the ladies will within seconds start price negotiations for the overnight. They tend not to do 1-2 hours but will happily price that if asked. After that it is a trip to the check in to get them registered (For Police and Fire purposes) and then you can take them up to your room and try what you have purchased. Algerian ladies tend to be highly enthusiastic and you can have a great time however caveat emptor as with all things punting, if there is a bum note in the bar, do NOT ignore it.
Ghenghis Punting Index for Algeria puts it at +5 (Out of 1-10)
Morocco
Morocco is a haven for punting in North Africa and the Islamic countries although as with everything, including it's great religious tolerance, it is not evident on the surface.
All of the major cities have bars/nightclubs with selective entry which locals and westerners of a reasonable dress code can gain admittance to and which offer dining, drinking and dancing. A lot of these are also frequented by the higher end of the working girl community and your hotel concierge, if asked discretely, will point you towards one within reasonable distance of your hotel.
Once there, just going to the bar or going on to the dance floor (Even accompanied by a lady) will make you available to be hit on by ladies of negotiable virtue who will dance alongside you or even with you and then ask you to buy them a drink (Normal bar prices NOT £200 bottle of 'champagne' ). Over the drink they propose prices and venues. Be warned, if they go back to your hotel, you will have to buy a cheap room for them, if you go back to their room it is riskier but cheaper. Your choice. You do get some genuine French girls there working but in the main they are local ladies.
Another new thing that is taking hold is Hammam Massage which is a "Turkish" Bath experience but with exfoliation. Ensure that the Spa you use is staffed by ladies though as normally they are available for me, staffed by men and that is a totally different experience!! The one staffed by ladies and recommended by the concierge tend to be ones where, after the whole refreshing and cleansing is completed by a buxom young lady in a wet suit, she is then persuaded to remove the wet suit and join you for a gloriously sweaty romp. Be warned though that these young ladies do not carry condoms and so if you want the ultimate climax to this even you need to bring your own which they will enthusiastically employ.
Following the Hammam, you are taken to a rest area where you cool down on a bed with scented rose water dripped on you and mint tea. Once you have calmed sufficiently round 2 starts where another young lady takes you into a massage room where unguents and creams are liberally employed and the result of any excitement is dealt with joyfully for a small additional charge agreed.
After that you are offered a shower before leaving, and if there is any life in the old dog by that time, a charming new young lady will assist you to remove any lingering stiffness.
When you are dressing, the various ladies will visit you for their agreed "presents" which they receive courteously with a kiss.
Ghenghis Punting Index for Morocco puts it at +9 (Out of 1-10)
Pakistan
Finally, Pakistan. Now those of you who know me, know that I tend to be equally at home in Islamic countries as with others however Pakistan is one of my favourites. Despite all the Newspaper hysteria, it is generally a very peaceful country with the majority of people interested in feeding themselves and their families, having somewhere reasonable to live, get their children properly educated and having a job to pay for these benefits. Yes there is a lot wrong too but on balance I like the place and the people.
In Pakistan the whole sex industry is underground and you do need the help of a trusted local to get in on the scene however once in you can do anything from sex parties to individual punts. The punts tend to be at your hotel or flat if you are a westerner and the parties at friends flats.
Straightforward punts tend to be overnighters and for a fixed price you have all the sex you can both handle. Although again they also have Russian girls working, you can also get local girls but check the ages as looks can be deceptive and girls get married there at 14 and you need to be sure. I tend to ask specifically for NOT under 25 which means they are of working age in the UK and meet my own moral stance.
The sex parties are where a varying number of ladies do increasingly more erotic and explicit dances, individually and a s a group whilst the attendant males eat, drink alcohol and smoke (Smoking is a bane in Islamic countries as a rule) and then at points in the evening, one of more of the performers and guests retire to one of the bedrooms to make smiles. Depending on the generosity of your host/friend, you will either be insulting him if you offer to pay or sometimes if you don't but it is sensible to ask prior to the event in all cases.
Ghenghis Punting Index for Pakistan puts it at +7 (Out of 1-10)
So, a very small taster of Punting in Islamic countries but hopefully one where you can get a glimpse of the possibilities and realise that it is not the barren wasteland for punting as it sometimes is portrayed but rather a chance to gain experiences.
First a little learning as per the Wikipaedia entry on Charles Ponzi:
A Ponzi scheme is a fraudulentinvestment operation that pays returns to separate investors, not from any actual profit earned by the organization, but from their own money or money paid by subsequent investors. The Ponzi scheme usually entices new investors by offering returns other investments cannot guarantee, in the form of short-term returns that are either abnormally high or unusually consistent. The perpetuation of the returns that a Ponzi scheme advertises and pays requires an ever-increasing flow of money from investors to keep the scheme going.
Charles Ponzi
The system is destined to collapse because the earnings, if any, are less than the payments to investors. Usually, the scheme is interrupted by legal authorities before it collapses because a Ponzi scheme is suspected or because the promoter is selling unregistered securities. As more investors become involved, the likelihood of the scheme coming to the attention of authorities increases.
The scheme is named after Charles Ponzi[1] who became notorious for using the technique in early 1920. Ponzi did not invent the scheme (for example Charles Dickens' 1857 novel Little Dorrit described such a scheme decades before Ponzi was born), but his operation took in so much money that it was the first to become known throughout the United States. Ponzi's original scheme was based on the arbitrage of international reply coupons for postage stamps; however, he soon diverted investors' money to support payments to earlier investors and himself.
OK, now time to rant and explode a few myths currently being put out by Tory Fat Cats funded by the Stock Market and Bankers who really do not give a shit about common people as we are only here as sheep to be shorn by them in order to keep their Fat Cat Lifestyles going - a la Fred (Hang the bastard) Goodwin and his ilk.
The UK Government decided around the time of Bevin and Co, just about the time they brought in the NHS and decided workers did not need their eyes or teeth looked after via the NHS but could sort those privately, that the pensions paid to State employees would be paid from what they termed an "unfunded" scheme. Thus the then current pensioners would be paid their pensions out of the contributions of those not yet at pensionable age.
For those of you quick on the uptake, this was exactly the same type of scheme as pioneered by Charles Ponzi in the 20's.
Later, as Private Companies started their own pension schemes and insurance companies followed suit the Government imposed regulations that insisted that all such schemes be "Funded", i.e., that the contributions would go into an investment pot that with prudent investment would increase in value over time and thus provide the wherewithal for the Pension Provider to pay the pension earned. The Governemt later also insisted that the Firms paid in a pension contribution alongside the worker so that they too bore some of the costs. Therefore pay for everyone was reduced in order to pay for the pensions and Pensions became effectively deferred payment for labour.
However, despite everyone warning successive Governments, no UK Government ever put any money aside from the contributions paid into the pension schemes by the workers. They also took no account of the fact that these pensions were index linked in the main to the Retail Price Index.
Then came the banking crisis, led by such august luminaries as the newly knighted Sir Fred Goodwin who bought new meaning to the phrase "laughing all the way to the bank" and after what can only be regarded as a term of complete and utter lunacy it it's cavalier disregard for any of the normal banking principles such as prudence, common sense, conservative principles, adherence to basic banking rules or a whole number of measures and processes developed through the years the banks collapsed leaving all of the common people deeply in debt unto their children's children's times.
Smug Bastard!
Thus the government said "we must be prudent and draw in our horns. Instead of public crucifixion of "Sir" Fred Goodwin, or even asking Madge to take back his knighthood and bung him in the tower, what did we get? We got a derisory amount given back to us in a mockery of an attempt to shown embarrassment and then two fingers as he buggered off to try and spend all that was left.
As the government's Ponzi Pension scheme managed to not only run in to Sir Fred and Chums' banking crisis but also the "grey majority" where people were living longer due to better health care and to a better standard of living with the double whammy of less people in employment in the UK, they realised they had to do something and quickly or they could not sit in their London Clubs and chortle over "those foreign wallahs" in Greece and Spain getting their currencies knocked by Standard and Poors because they UK would soon be up the swanee as well. How could they cut down on the promised pensions without looking like the rogues and charlatans they were? Someone had to come up with "a cunning plan" and bloody quick or the Bullingdon Mafia were for the high jump and no mistake.
The first part of the plan was to blame the workers themselves and so the Bullingdon Blaggers got their chums from Eton and Harrow to start the biggest smear story going and started spreading the lie that the Public Sector Unions had enforced "Gold Plated Pensions" well over and above those available to the private sector workers. "Divide and conquer had always been a good plan ever since the Roman invaders had used it to go from a pretty small and ineffective City in what became Italy to a world spanning Empire. (Incidentally the Roman Empire was also a Ponzi scheme as it relied totally upon always conquering new territories to fund the lifestyles of the existing citizens of the Empire, once the conquering stopped, it imploded).
Thus Public Sector workers were vilified by the press as parasites living off the poor old private sector when in fact the public sector pay was always lower than the private sector just because the pensions were allegedly better.
The second strand of the debate was to close all final salary schemes as soon as possible. This was done in order to increase the profits of all the private sector companies at the expense of their workers and to save costs in Government by minimising the pensions payout.
The third and positively fiendish part was that as any accountant knows, when you ask them "What is the outcome of doing this?" The reply is always "What do you want it to be?". So, if you want to reduce index linked pensions quickly and seem to be fair, just change the index.
Thus the change on how the index linked part works FROM RPI TO CPI. RPI has for generations been the way we measure inflation and is the yardstick with which we measure inflation, our finacial wellbeing, our wealth and indeed our feelgood factor or otherwise. Historically CPI is always a couple of percent BELOW RPI and so the Governemt loves that, as do the Private Sector who were quicker to adopt that measure than a rat up a drainpipe once the Governemt had led the way. Incidentally the Government also have linked State Benefits to CPI as well so that will steadily reduce the total cost of State benefits and eventually force those lazy workshy paraplegics into fiull time employment if they do not wish to starve to death.
So, who gains and who loses here?
Well, it is manifestly obvious who LOSES here and it is the workers both Private and Public who are going once again to fund the excesses of the Financial Sector and those who gain, apart from Fred Goodwin, will be those in the Finacial Sector who will not only provide pensions for the private sector but who will also have designs on taking over the public sector pensions (So long as they have a cast iron Government pledge to underwrite said pensions). Thus the Bullingdon Boys and their Fat Cat chums ride off into the sunset taking our hard earned dosh with them while their replacements get on with the job of fleecing us.
So, readers, if you have got this far, altogether now, say "Baaaaaaaaaaaa!!".
Thousands of women in the US and Canada have been marching on "slutwalks" against a police officer in Toronto's use of the word "slut" in a derogatory sense; apparently he said that "women should try not to dress like 'sluts' in order not to be victimised and raped". He clearly failed his sensitivity training as well as proving himself to be a first class dickhead however the article did tickle my fancy in a number of areas:
This is probably because to start with, most of my harlot sorority friends call me the "male slut" or "mantart"!! However it could also be because most ladies tend to dislike being labelled, and especially as a tart, trollop or slut.
However, clearly the US and Canadian ladies are made of sterner stuff and demand their right to be as slutty as possible and to reclaim the word slut much as the "Gay" community reclaimed the word "queer"! (??)
Personally I wouldn't mind claiming the word "Gay" back from them if they are finished with it and providing they wash it first!
However I digress.
If being a slut is to dress well and to look extremely attractive to all us men and to dress to impress then I for one am all for it however I do think that they need to really think this out properly so as to keep all of us Hoochy Coochy Men from making the grave error of thinking a slut, slattern, or trollop is in reality a whore, harlot, jade, prostitute or Tom and thus offering her pictures of the Queen in return for the unbridled passions of carnal congress and thus both committing the crime of importuning as well as being likely to get your face slapped or the attentions of an irate husband/boyfriend.
Maybe they should wear badges?
I thought.................................................
but then I realised, they already have one!!
So then I was really, well, foxed, not to put too fine a point on it.
All of these fine upstanding, marching and protesting women, instead of getting good wholesome exercise strutting their stuff on a pole in a dingy club where you expect Ho's and sluts are instead wearing badges proclaiming their moral turpitude in the High Street in order to stick it to the man (Which when you come to think of it is a complete role reversal). On a personal note I hope they really get into it and start wearing tartier and tartier clothing as it will really brighten up my week even if in the long run it does put insurance premiums up through the roof!
So, what is next for these ladies? Once they have paraded half-naked and with 9" see-thru acrylic heels in their stockings and suspenders and waspies, will they progress to rubbing themselves suggestively on street furniture or eachother and occasionally dropping to their knees to give fellatio to passing strangers? Exactly how far will these women go in order to disprove the myth that dressing and acting like a slut is dangerous around uncontrolled men?
Q. Why did the ant stop climbing up the elephants leg? A. He got pissed off!
Yes its an old joke, not dissimilar to me in fact but it sets the scene to segue neatly into my long awaited return to Blogging with a diatribe on the people and things that Piss Me Off. A sort of "Grumpy Old Ghenghis" but in Blog Form rather than a TV programme (Also I don't get paid for doing it which also pisses me off!).
Years ago I got "that list", you know, the one with the little boy on it who is saying "Every Day I am Forced to Add Someone to the List of People who Piss Me Off!!". Well, I think we all really have that list, even if it is only a mental one and even if we do not keep it religiously but more in an Anglican fashion of just for high days and holidays. So here is mine:
The List of People and Things that really PISS ME OFF!!
This is not an exhaustive List and will vary from time to time dependant upon anything from ground temperature, distance to the nearest Kharzi or hunger. In no particular order:
Bastards who drive in the centre lane of a three or four lane motorway despite being slower than anyone else and despite space to their left. I would like purple spray paint cannon to leave them in no doubt what fuckwits they are!
Bureaucrats and Jobsworths - people who have a petit fonctionaire type job but who love to exercise the minimal control they have over that function to really make your life difficult. Their usual excuse is along the lines of "I would love to be helpful and do what is sensible but it is more than my jobs worth to be helpful. Tarring and feathering is too good for these people
Bankers - These hypocritical fat cats who first fuck up our economy so badly that it will be a toss up as to if our descendants actually do mange to pay off the debts incurred before Global Warming makes the planet uninhabitable and then pay themselves super bonus' under the threat of buggering off somewhere else to fuck up their economies!! Confiscate all their goods and possessions, sell their wives to a brothel and their children to slavery and then hang 1 in 10 of them from a city lampost (No, you twat, not the same lamp post, one each!) and deport the other 9.
Oil Companies - bleeding leeches to a man, every year Oil Companies post bigger and bigger profits and yet every year those same oil companies tell us how the people that pump the gas do it for love and that it is just the Government who makes money out of oil. BULLSHIT!!!! Have you seen how much money they are making? They are making that out of people like you and me. What's more, they are mainly American companies and which country whines most about Petrol Prices and pays the least (If you don't count Saudi Arabia)?? Yes, America!!
The EU/EEC/whatever the fuck they call themselves today - The majority of our fucked up laws, as opposed to the sensible ones that made us Great, are from the EU and the latest one is the fuckwittery of Super-Injunctions that are now grantable to the rich and famous by Judges whose parentage is questionable and their grasp on reality even looser. What makes this even more farcical is the prime mover of this latest EU Farce Law is the French whose state is apparently based upon Liberte, Fraternite and Egalite - well, I suppose to the average Frog, one out of three is a result and beats their War Record
Poppy Burners and Royal Wedding Protesters - including those CNUTS who protested at (Soon to be Royal) Wootton Bassett. These people do have a right to legitimate and peaceful protest but their actions are also behaviour liable to cause a Breach of the Peace, especially if the fuckers do this anywhere near me, and any reasonable individual would surely expect the local plod present to "Read the Riot Act" to those pulling those stunts and similar and then give them a good truncheoning and a few nights to recover at the local nick??
Anarchists - Like those idiots in Black who decided to take over a misguided TUC march that was as vacuous and vague as Cameron's Big Society ideas and kick in shop windows etc. Also the idiots in Bristol who sallied forth from their squat against a local Tesco Express. Shave their heads, put them in leg irons and orange jump suits and have them cleaning the streets for the next 3 years
Politicians - enough said?? - OK, maybe the last thirty years plus of these self serving bastards has not convinced you it is time for a real change, well it has me. Let's get AV in to start with just to prove we can change the political rues without incurring the Wrath of God and then have a debate on what methods we really want to elect our politicians and change again to that one. If we do NOT take this chance to make a change, however cosmetic, we will lose all opportunities for the next Century.
Sizeists - Those people who are naturally slim thanks to the right DNA and who can eat tons of buns and pies without putting on an ounce who then slag off people who are not similarly blessed. One git who really had a habit of doing that was that long lanky streak of piss, Jasper Carrott. Well Jasper, you are a bit of a pudge bucket yourself now aren't you, care to tell us how disgusted you are with yourself?? Also, those ladies with lovely boobs with no sag who laugh at skinny women with no tits and call them "Boylike" and other daft names. Just be happy as you are and if not do you best to change but not to damage yourself.
Selfish Gits - People who go their whole way through life taking and using, who drop litter, use people, and never think of once doing a little charity work, looking after an old neighbour, donating blood, helping with reading at a local school, supporting Help for Heroes or any one of a number of things that make our world turn. These are the Easyjet generation, the ones with sharp elbows who run to the plane, the ones that always buy thousands of bog-rolls or bread if there is a shortage looming and the ones who move house so their kid can get in to a better school.
OK, so there are only ten so far on my list but I am sure that you have a different ten and feel free to add those via comments below.
